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The Fifth Commandment – Honor Your Parents
God says, in Exodus 20:12 NKJV, Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.
It is worth noting that the fourth and fifth are the only two that tell us what we are to do. Only the fifth comes with a promise of a longer life. The other five tell us what not to do. This is why people consider God’s Law as “thou shalt nots.”
God indeed tells us what we cannot do. He wants us to understand right from wrong. Jesus reminds us that the Sabbath was made for man and not man for the Sabbath. Truthfully, I believe all the Commandments were made for man’s welfare. God gave them to us as laws because we seem to have trouble doing what is best for us without a little pressure.
Honor your father and your mother!
It seems like everyone should understand this law. God not only created us, but He also created the idea of families. Families started with Adam and Eve, and God has blessed parents ever since with children. God expects children to honor their father and mother, even if they are not perfect.
Parents certainly are not perfect. They struggle every day to do what is right for their children. Sometimes they succeed, and sometimes they fail.
God knew it would be that way when He commanded us to honor our mother and father.
All our parents are different!
Each time I read this commandment, I thank God for my father and mother. They loved each of their six children. We had to work hard from the time we could walk, but most other children did too. My parents made us feel wanted and needed, and never abused us.
I am sure some of you had better parents than I did, but sadly, some of you had parents who did not treat you as well as you should have been treated.
My father and mother both had a sixth-grade education. In those days, my mother was able to teach school in a one-room school in New Mexico for a while. I found it interesting that they wanted all their children to finish high school and go to college. Most of us did.
Both parents worked hard, and we were never hungry. We always, at least, had beans and usually cornbread to go with them.
However, my parents were not perfect. My father fought a battle with alcohol until he was in his fifties. He never missed a day’s work, but when the weekend came, if he could get it, he was drunk. A happy drunk, but still a drunk.
Jesus delivered my father from that demon in his early fifties. He was never drunk again.
I am privileged. My parents’ love for us was never questioned. After we had grown and scattered all across the country, they saved so they could visit each one every year.
Your parents may have been very different.
Some, I am sure, were better, but I know some of you had very poor experiences growing up. Maybe your parents even disappeared, or they stayed, but they were cruel to you. It is so sad that many parents do not realize how God has entrusted their children to them, to love and teach them about Him and His love.
If you are a parent, I pray that you realize how important it is to parent the children God has given to you. Have you taught them to put God first in their lives? Are you teaching them to be responsible in everything they do? God gave the fifth commandment to help us realize how very important the job of parenting is to both the child and the parent.
The breakdown of the family has devastated our country.
Families are breaking apart, and divorce is a plague on our land. Many of our young men and women have abandoned the idea of marriage. Couples are living together and producing children. One leaves, and the other tries to raise them outside of God’s plan.
Parenting should start with a God-ordained marriage. It is the foundation of a nation, and without it, the nation crumbles. Children are abandoned, and each generation gets worse than the one before.
Parents are a unit. Paul reminds us of this in Ephesians 5:31 NKJV “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” When the two become one, they soon become PARENTS. This is God’s plan, and it works when we do it His way. Throughout time, no other system has worked.
Any other way fails.
It is time for us to return to God’s Plan and honor our parents.
Today, little attention is paid to the Fifth Commandment. You only need to open your eyes in any place where people gather to see disrespect for parents. It has been growing for decades, and now it is considered normal by many.
Part of the problem is that in the sixties, parents stopped parenting. Children were turned over to babysitters and then to schools. They were not taught to honor or respect anything. The idea of “looking out for #1” became a life theme. Both parents went to work and let the children raise themselves.
Parents became part of the problem.
Raising children has always been a challenge. That is why God ordained marriage. Two adults could teach their children better than one. Children were never meant to be raised by one parent.
Notice in Ephesians how Paul addresses this problem. He says in Ephesians 6:1-4 NKJV Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: 3 “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.”
4 And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.
Notice that Paul addresses parents training their children in the way of the Lord. Parents are not to provoke their children, but to train and encourage them to follow God’s laws.
When this is done, children will honor their parents.
How important is honoring your father and mother?
Jesus did not change our responsibility to our parents. He even mentions that in the Law of Moses, wronging a parent could result in being put to death. Listen to Mark 7:10 NKJV For Moses said, ‘Honor your father and your mother’; and, ‘He who curses father or mother, let him be put to death.’
Jesus is not telling us we should kill our rebellious children. He is pointing out how serious our relationship with our parents is. Parents should always be shown respect.
Today, even within our churches, you sometimes see disrespect for parents.
There is no way around our responsibility to honor our mother and father!
Matthew includes a little more information about how the Jewish leaders were building a way around the Law when it suited them. In this text, Jesus recites the Law and then condemns them for trying to avoid their responsibility to care for their parents.
Pay attention to what Jesus says in Matthew 15:4-6 NKJV 3 He answered and said to them, “Why do you also transgress the commandment of God because of your tradition? 4 For God commanded, saying, ‘Honor your father and your mother’; and, ‘He who curses father or mother, let him be put to death.’ 5 But you say, ‘Whoever says to his father or mother, “Whatever profit you might have received from me is a gift to God”— 6 then he need not honor his father or mother.’ Thus, you have made the commandment of God of no effect by your tradition. 7 Hypocrites!
Honoring our parents does not stop when they get old! Children should take care of their parents when needed. Jesus makes it clear that saying we are giving to God is never an excuse for not caring for our mother and father.
In Conclusion:
Honoring our parents is a God-given commandment, but one with a promised blessing.
God is not speaking only to children of a young age.
It does not change as we grow older and our parents become grandparents.
This commandment applies to all of us. He is commanding each of us to honor our parents at all points in life.
It is our job as parents to teach our children their responsibilities toward God and His Law.
Will you follow God’s commandment?
Click the following links to continue your study of all the Commandments, The First Commandment – No Other God!, The Second Commandment – No Idols, The Third Commandment -The Lord’s Name, The Fourth Commandment – The Sabbath,